When Life Moves in a Different Direction

Whew, I have been putting off this post for a while now. It's not that I haven't come to terms with this decision, but because once I hit send, it's out there and it makes it all the more real.

When I started my photography business 3 years ago, it was the beginning of a dream I had held for 10 years. I wanted to document people's stories through my lens; giving them memories they would cherish for years to come. I can honestly say, I did that. I enjoyed every minute of it; mentoring under some amazing photographers and connecting with new people. I grew so much as a photographer and gained a deeper appreciation for the craft I had grown to love over the years.

The thing with dreams though, is you gotta hold them lightly. Sometimes our dreams become the exact thing we were hoping for, sometimes they don't work out the way we wanted them too, and sometimes they are only meant to last for a season. For me, It was a series of things that ultimately led to me closing the doors on this little business I had built.

I have been a SAHM since having my first 6 years ago. It was a decision my husband and I made together at the very beginning and while there is sacrifice involved, it was a decision that made the most sense for us. With a husband in law enforcement, our life is unpredictable. Schedules are constantly changing and he's gone quite often. I am my kid's stability and being home allows us the flexibility to prioritize family time when he is home, which was something that was very important to us. Most recently, my husband switched positions which changed his schedule to longer days. With this change, I am now acting as a single parent during the week. With one kid in school and the other still at home, priorities had to shift once again and there just isn't enough of me to go around. See with photography, it's so much more than just taking photos. It's hours and hours of prep, editing, marketing, research, and honing in on your skills. I would spend all of my free hours during nap time and after bed time trying to get in as much business work as I could. And for a while, it was worth it. But as our life has changed, I have changed.

I held onto this little dream of mine for as long as I could. If I am being honest, I was afraid of what I would be without it. Don't get me wrong, I love being at home with my kids but I wanted something that was mine, apart from motherhood. It filled my creative cup and gave me a sense of purpose. But in these last several months, God has been gently telling me it's okay to let go and release my grasp from it. When I finally did, I felt a sigh of relief. Sometimes we get so stuck on trying to keep control that we don't always realize it had us chained. And the beautiful thing is, letting go opened my eyes to new possibilities and dreams. Starting a business for me was just the catalyst. It allowed me to explore different niches and what lights me up and what doesn't.

Moving forward, photography will always be a part of my life. It's one of those rare spaces where I feel like I can be completely myself. The world feels dark right now but there's still so much light and beauty surrounding us. I see it everywhere I look. Photography allows me to capture it and share it with the world. In this season, I want more of that. To tell a different story through my lens. One of slowness and softness. One that connects with the heart of humans through nature and travel and motherhood.

I will always be grateful for business I started, the people who trusted me to document their memories, and the spark it lit in me. As I forge forward, I carry that spark with me—letting it guide a new chapter rooted in intention, creativity, and a deeper connection with those and the world around me.

Xx,

Hayley